now or never

8mths in army -20081208

2008-12-08T13:03:00.003+08:00

today is 080808!
08mths in army;
08 is the year;
08 is the date too!

oh my..
idk what im so excited about, maybe it's just the something that were gonna have on 26-30dec..

well, just one of the days only, cos i guess yer all still wanna keep by ur loved ones during this period of xmas-new year so yeah. =) it's just one day of dinner + chillin'!

anyway, just an update of myself..
currently nsf (still.. another 14mths to go till civvie),
jungle hat holder with khaki beret (not yet get khaki, but going to get soon..),
now at home typing this blog out, which ive like abandoned for more than just a few months,
idk what to write next.. lol..

i guess im like so faraway attached to life outside now..
anyway, the john little sale in expo rite now will end 1030pm tonite with greate sales, but the special rattan-like material-ed mattresses seems a bit exp for me to get.. it feels great on it btw =)

oh well, what to do now...
wanted to go kbp yesterday nite, but kinda shrugged it off with all the bleach n naruto mange/anime that i was watching online =/
i guess my own entertainment is more important than just going over to kill some time..

btw.. im starting to like this song (corrinne may - shelter) =)

---
What's wrong, what's getting you down?
Was it something I might have said?
You're walking around with your head to the ground
And your eyes are watery red

I know you've been through tough times
Kicked around, thrown to the ground
But you've always been the strong one
So don't tell me that nobody gets you
'cos I'm standing in your corner
Knocking at your door
You don't have to be alone

Just call my name, let me be an answer
'cos it hurts me to see you this way
I wanna ease your pain, help me understand
Let me be your shelter my friend

We share a bond, you and I, we belong
We're like coffee and morning trains
You strip my defenses, I catch your pretenses
The same blood runs through our veins

I swore I'd be your lifeline, made a vow
That I'd surround you with love at every milestone
I'll listen when nobody gets you
I'm still standing in your corner
Waiting by your door
You don't have to be alone

Just call my name, let me be an answer
'cos it hurts me to see you this way
I wanna ease your pain, help me understand
Let me be your shelter my friend

It was not too long ago
You sought to understand
You helped me mend
Remember when

So promise me you'll call my name
Let me be an answer
'cos it hurts me to see you this way
I wanna ease your pain, help me understand
Let me be your shelter my friend

in the army~ -20080816

2008-08-16T16:43:00.004+08:00

gahhh...
been in the army for like what 4 mths alr? feels like a blink of an eye. i kinda miss all my prev frens and buddies, tho i have new ones in the army. ive been thinking alot since theres always some free time here and there, for all the time in the world given to me..

for frens, i hope that well always still keep in touch, for i saw charles, ian, christopher, kaixian, joey, and some more that i cant realli rmb since it was so long ago alr.. kekeke... some from sec sch, others from jc that even i forget and they yet still rmb me... i realli have to give it to them =) sometimes, thay kinda make the day brighter, and im like dull most of the time, lol. i can onli say i can try, but most rather than not, im tired by the time i reach home, and yet i still keep myself going till the midnights. i hope u guys still rmb me and keep in contact, youll be my frens for only so short a lifetime..

for those i love, i realli miss you all =( practically only able to squeeze out a bit of time for u all, but i still want u all out there to know that i still care for u all, priorities to you.. i may seem cold, but ill be your fren in need, be there as often as i can, but i need you to tell me what had happened, for most of time im preoccupied by the higher-ups to do other stuff, and i cant get back to you fast enough.. im abruptly and really really sorry for that, because i cant do anything to help it.. if i could.. ill rush over to u, keep you company, let you know that for whatever happens... ill still be there for you, ALL THE TIME! =)

for the time now.. im reconnecting myself with the outside world.. yes, im not exactly joking.. kekekeke... time spent in here sometimes bore me to the point where i feel like breaking already, but then again, i have to endure it, with my brothers, buddies and friends by my side, everyone playing a part in this whole period of time.. thanks ppl.. thanks T_T

---

TO MY CHILD
Just for this morning,

I am going to smile

when I see your face and

laugh when I feel like crying.

Just for this morning,

I will let you choose

what you want to wear, and

smile and say how perfect it is.

Just for this morning,

I am going to step over the laundry and

pick you up and

take you tothe park to play.

Just for this morning,

I will leave the dishes in the sink, and

let you teach me

how to put that puzzle of yours together.

Just for this afternoon,

I will unplug the telephone and

keep the computer off, and

sit with you in the backyard and blow bubbles.

Just for this afternoon,

I will not yell once,

not even a tiny grumble

when you scream and whine

for the ice cream truck, and

I will buy you one if he comes by.

Just for this afternoon,

I won't worry about

what you are going to be when you grow up, or

second guess every decision I have made

where you are concerned.

Just for this afternoon,

I will let you help me bake cookies, and

I won't stand over you

trying to fix them.

Just for this afternoon,

I will take us to McDonald's and

buy us both a Happy Meal so

you can have both toys.

Just for this evening,

I will hold you in my arms and

tell you a story about

how you were born and

how much I love you.

Just for this evening,

I will let you splash in the tub and

not get angry.

Just for this evening,

I will let you stay up late

while we sit on the porch and

count all the stars.

Just for this evening,

I will snuggle beside you

for hours, and

miss my favourite TV shows.

Just for this evening,

when I run my finger

through your hair as you pray,

I will simply be grateful

that God has given me

the greatest gift ever given.

-
I will think about the mothers and fathers who

are searching for their missing children,

the mothers and fathers who

are visiting their children's graves

instead of their bedrooms.

The mothers and fathers

who are in hospital rooms

watching their children suffer

senselessly and screaming inside

that little body.

And when I kiss you goodnight,

I will hold you

a little tighter,

a little longer.

It is then,

that I will thank God

for you, and

ask him for nothing,

except one more day..............

just.. one.. more.. da.y...

loves, yet broken -080623

2008-06-23T02:14:00.002+08:00

im going back in camp.. nd yet u still chose to ignore me..

i feel sad, yet i do not know what to do..

im so breathless, yet i can breathe..

you are pink on a grayscale world, yet colours brighten up your day..

songs are meant to soothe the mind, yet it destroys the very mind inside out..

you pour out from my mind, and yet i cannot touch you..

i see the pink, but yet you do not hear me..

sadness reigns, in the world of mine...

mapling -20080315

2008-03-15T02:46:00.005+08:00

it's so boring to be not working when ure working part time and not full time..
ive been having so many ppl asking me how come i dun wanna go for full time when i can, and the reason is.................. cos there's no slots and im lazy la! still got what reason? o_O

anyway, ive been stuck up on maple for a few days and now my eq slots are full (yes, even my storage characters) =X
i guess that's kinda a lot, considering that i haven been on the free market to sell things via demand and supply theories, all the theories and stuff, but because i really dunno the price.. lols. guess i'd have to spend a horde of time in fm.. lols

i wanted to post something earlier, abt the cockroach or something like that, but i totally forgot what to write. i think im getting senile (not alzhemiers, that is =p), and getting worse at remembering things. i hope i can remember when is the deadline for the university registration (yes, it's 1apr08, for the year of 2008).
*omg that was the first [apostophe] (see i cant even spell this right, or did i? O_O)of this post, which i just realised*

lols. there's so many things to throw into here, like who ive been thinking of, what ive been doing, what ive been feeling, but i always forget to blog. can someone PLEASE REMIND me to blog instead of playing maplestory (maplesea to be exact, aquila). ill thank u alot =))

liyun, ah pok, michelle, yujuan (omg why is this name here? o_O)

tired seh -150208

2008-02-15T03:40:00.004+08:00

omg tired seh..................
been spending like my whole day on kbox >.<
went over to ms in the afternoon, then 8-2am at kbp. wah pain. leg pain!!!

hai. even recep oso say leg pain.. wat to say? mus be too many customers -stand, sit, stand, sit, stand, sit. sohai. been some time since i last saw zhi an and 'el' (too bad i cant rmb ur name =p RYUSAKI), nite seems kinda weird w/o u guys sia. tho ah ber, yuan jun and aaron kinda chirpped up the atmosphere a bit... oh and there's also chun yan, si ling n of cos, 'mapok' (wooops i found this name by random >.<)

the love potion.. hai... now my arms trembling alr.. LOL kinda think of it, sick alr.. so heavy and tua kong. >.< valentine not a gd day to work anyway -.-

oh well, they're at ber house playing blackjack right now.. too bad i working 1-5 at hg later, if not sure go.. now sian sehhh..

anyway, super got so bad meh? o_O

long time no see -20080204

2008-02-04T12:31:00.000+08:00

hai.. just deleted 2 para of what i wrote in this -.- now i have to re-write them back =(

hey hey! long time no see guys! been thinking of not posting since sept last year, since i was TOO BORED to post anything, but now im back =) anyway.. chinese new year is approaching and hence, HAPPY CNY! =D

ive been working in kbox for like er... 2mths plus le ba.. been happy working there and dont say the job's not dangerous at all, with all the kids running all around the corridors and our hands full of glasses n stuff, u cant say it's not a dangerous job -.- peiwen's job is more safe imo, but the area if pretty much filled with bhangra pple, DANGEROUS SEH! so it ends up with admin work is the safest, with 9-5 hours, just that health probs will come in time to come =) eg. back aches, stiff neck, MYOPIA (aka short-sightedness, physically) etc etc..

so. ive ran over 3 outlets of kbox until now, which is almost 1/3 of the total amt of outlets there are presently, and if u guys didn't know, there's a new outlet at downtown east, but dun ask me when it will open, cos i oso dunnooo.... hai. i still have to work at hougang plaza kbox for cny period, from 2nd to 4th day, but hopefully the pay will be a bit more =)

seems so boring that everyone else have gone into army or full time jobs, while im still doing part time -.- im so siannnnnn...... no one is online, no one to talk to, wahhhhhhhh........

er... seriously, ive lost some contacts, but i just saw one of them at amk hub yesterday, which is vincent. lol. he recognises my face but i reckon he's lost my name =p my name is that hard to remember and pronounce eh? too bad im not changin my name!

new phone se w850i -20070924

2007-09-24T22:46:00.000+08:00

heyy everybadi!
i just got myself a new phone todae, it's w850i! ok la i noe it's an OLD OLD model alr, but none the less, i still got it wat.. keke..

oh the chem test today was a gonner. killer qn was 5, but i started on 5 for 15mins. 15mins WASTED.. zzz.

hey hey hey, the starhub customer service all look very yound, abt late teens, early 20s nia. anyone interested to join them? cos to me, they seem a bit blur. ok. maybe it was me :x

c'mon im bored. talk pple, talk!

ohohoh. i nearly forgot.. im sry peewee, cant go down to help u today, but tmr bo bian wat. that's the onli time i release from lessons, no choice, unless u wan me to pon tang? ^^
*ps. i MITE just pon tang, but P( X = "pon tang" ).. aiya idk la. sian. ask me to make this kinda decision. sian. mrlee miracle buy pizza. he like so frendly-cum-xxx. lol. dun speak more later i get whack more. ><

ps. mrlee, u not that bad la. jus that sometimes i jus sian in front of u. n rmb, dun giv pw so much work lei. she very stress alr.. :s

long time no see -20070923

2007-09-23T20:43:00.000+08:00

hao jiu mei you blog le.
(so long nv blog alr.)

lol. sian. been having tests, tests and more tests all round, and i just realise i pass my chem. lol, not very high la. just middle of the class lor.

hai. so long nv blog alr, so many things i wanna say lor. but then see and see ad see, just didn't feel like blogging. cos i lazy. LAZY. know how to spell it? L-A-Z-Y. hahas

eh.. spammed happy birthday to jialin, for er.. i dunno how to say, just the feeling bah. :)
peewee pls jia you for the coursework k.. i dun noe if u will c this, but yeah. jia you. ill go down when i can, but u havta ask k? cos i dunno if ull be there, go down oso paiseh, tho ppl there alr know me as tho i study dere, but they too smart le. i cant match them ><
arghhhhh. sian. ly ly ly! r u lookin at this? lols. no one come n c my blog de.. maybe cos i nv advertise? lol

ok. i jus found out todae that weisiong injured his ankle, and NOT HIS KNEE, as what so many ppl said after what grandmom say (no, of cos it's not u shich..), and he so happy nw everyday oso stay at home n play his pes 6 (soccer game). ahhhh. life is so sian. now so rush.. ppl dun even hav the time to talk..

minjiaaaaaaaaaaa.. lols. i just realise i getting noiser, tho i always so quiet. lol. i need & want so many things, but so little things can be realised. sian..

ohohoh.. peewee haven tell me her family name. lol ah ma, tell meeeeee..
not gorgetting this, all i want is for those that i love:
我要的只是你在我身边
:)

random -20070821

2007-08-21T23:34:00.000+08:00

heyz. havent been postin' for a long long time. i guess it's cos of my very low but high profile, whatever that was supposed to mean, cos i cant remember either! >.<

-----
ok now i rmb...
i've been doing some stuff the prev few mths, plus a few outdoor activities like SNCS, abseiling n stuff like that.. ne way, more exams coming up soon, with all the mini-test/exam that we're having like everyday, battling through the school hours...
-----

oh well, i thought todae was wednesday, when it was a tuesday!
wth! i only realised when i was like 1/2-way thru school, cos i was soooo sleepy man.. im such a sleepyhead! lols

anyway, clarence, if you had such a brother, why are you not as gd as him? (im assuming that your bro plays better than you...)
-but then again, that's just a thought, pretty rethorical anyway. stupid me

ahhh... life's getting bored. just sent a letter to the CMPB, hope i'll get accepted in the air! oh well, only like 10 pple out of the applicants within the whole year of pple, i think it's pretty tough to get in bahz... but at least i still have that very small chance to get in, rather than just nothing at all wat! =d

gah... gonna add a few more things into the rest of the pages. ciaos =)

been pretty long -20070631

2007-05-31T18:02:00.000+08:00

yeah... been pretty long since i last posted eh? ... acutally i jus wanted to take a rest from all these posting, and mke it irrelevant to some pple, like derrick and whoever noes who that is. hahaha

i've found something to do, but no one wants to play! ... well, been wanting to flame him since like 1mth ago, but... aiyaa.... too long nv talk liao hahahhaa
oh well, since ima here alrdy... let me flame him a lil... oh yeah. dere's this belle or is it belletrix, and then dere's always this clara. oh well, dragged this thought a lil too long. sry derrick, if MOH sees this, you're soooo dead =p

been a long -20070401

2007-04-01T11:29:00.000+08:00

someone's birthday just passed.
well, acting like i dun care, doesn't mean i dun care. it's a a pretty big thing to me, and it's hard to let go, or rather, just cant let go.
ignorance, obligation, regrets. oh well, shouldn't dwell too much on it, should i?

feelings just flow out, and i've yet to give this somthing. should i give it out, or should i just keep it with me?

not going mar xp - 20070312

2007-03-12T23:59:00.000+08:00

woke up late todae again.... sian....
it's like nothing much to talk about liao. my life is boring =)
it's a gd and bad thing anyway, so much loose time to do stuff but i would rather just waste it away, cos it's not like i'll feel better if i use it wisely. it's just different bah. well, everything is inside anyway, and i dun lke to say t out, just venting my feelings here...

oh ya... the ethernet card i bought yesterday... it's actualy quite good and working well, clocking max 21.34mbps for parallel downloading of 2x 1mb file =)
well... it's was one of the cheapest, but it's working good enough. at least for my very old computer that has a 478pin socket (nvm if you dunno this, just that it's a very old kind of motherboard). well, it's faster than some d core processors... hahaha...

it's been hard to think about what's going to happen anyway... no mar xp is like pretty boring but what to do? there's already so many reasons why i shouldn't go, and it tips the scales over why i should go... too bad i cant spend those 5 days with u peps, but i suppose it should be ok even without me bah... tho i noe that some of you get shy when i start treating ur injuries la... it's pretty ok, but why i want to go to xp has been defeated anyway, one way or another, you guys just din make me feel that i REALLY MUST go...

i wonder what's bad about me, what's good about me sometimes... can you guys, the pple arnd me, tell me what's gd/bad about me? straight in the face is the best =) so i can change for the better...

oh yeah.. jus edited friendster profile. added a few new things, but still pretty plain. add testimonials!!! =p

ok. jus end it here bah... nothing much happened todae anyway...

bought prolink realtek 8139 -20070311

2007-03-11T23:59:00.000+08:00

todae was quite busy man...
it wasn't a good idea to go down to sim lim on a sunday, since most of the shops werent open, and all the pple had time to go down, so it was actually crowding like extra sardines being squeezed into the sardine tin... well... i got one of the cheapest ethernet cards around, since my pc is already quite old but in good condition with i usually maintain, and i dun lag in games!!! (well... supposing the others were using like duo core processors and mine is like lagging at p4 2.86mhz)... haha.... shame on those that are actually using duo core and still lagging behind!!!

well, this man called me wihout identifying himself today, and asked me to ...
oh well... better not say it at all, since i dun wanna bust him for there's so many ill intentions in his head and she doesn't want to talk to him, but keep insisting that i call her for him (ooops.. did i say it was who? =p)
oh wel... he doesn't even want to talk to u, cos she doesn't even noe u at all... not that i dun want, but she dun even wanna talk to u before she sees ur photo, and you know arh... the ones in the year book are so blur that even i i bet with you, u oso counted as LOSE, if i show to the others and ask if they can recognise you... cos it's so freaking blur!!!

oh well... trip to marsiling wasn't actually that bad, just that the j1s are still very bad at packing backpacks (maybe we nv put enough emphasis on the packing, since there was so little time to actually prepare for it, with the cts and everything...). felt kinda sad when i realised that the dates clashed, tho everyone thought it wasn't appropriate, but what to do? i've got previously forged bonds that i'm more close with, although we have actually gone through thick and thin together... jus wanna say that i've already promised to go, and promises are not meant to be broken (yes, i mean it, and i do my best to keep to it, although you may have forgotten it somewhere or rather...)

well, it was quite a rush to do all these things todae, cos i woke up so late todae =p
how was todae for you pple reading this anyway? fun? boring? hectic? (maybe not bah... since todae is a sunday...) or maybe very slackish?

j1 cca orientation -20070309

2007-03-09T21:59:00.000+08:00

todae is so pretty boring... fun only started like after the cca orientation started...
odac ended so early... cos of orientation for the new j1s. there's only a total of 19 j1s going for the march xp '07. there's more j2s than j1s going... guess this 10th batch of odac pple are going to be so enthu, esp for eugene and agatha, as well as pple like marcus...

alrite... just to let you guys know about this, some nice things i can say about the mountains and places for march xp is...
ophir has a nice cool weather, provided it doesn't rain =p;
datok has a nice night view (without clouds);
lambak has pretty fresh air, with many early birds from the locals that climb it everyday (yes, everyday, according to what they say...). well... they like to say this phrase, "the early birds gets the worms" (in chinese, of course... hahas... they dun reali speak english much in m'sia, especially in those chinese villages where pple are more used to speaking chinese than english/malay...);
tioman... hmmm.... nice fishes, nice scenery, ad this year it's gonna be so much more relaxed cos mobster lim booked the WHOLE LINE of chalets, compared to last year's, where iz only booked like 2 chalets, one for the guys and one for the girls... well, royal rumble is gonna get pretty interesting.... can xiao bao pls take a vid for the royal rumble? it's gonna get so fun!!!

the bad stuff are...
datok has a pretty steep elevation for the middle part of it, for there are few rest points, but most prolly you guys wont realise it if you're climbing in the night n will reach the top of datok before dawn, for the sunrise there is also amazing, apart from the night sky (without coulds!!! if it's a cloudy night, then too bad... you cant have much fun =p). datok also has a big rock phase for the very last part, for which it migh get pretty dangerous esp in the night, for the equipment there is not exactly that stable after so many years of use, where it had stated to get pretty shaky since last nov, our operation 999... read the year magazine if u wanna know more!
lambak is pretty easy, except for the high steps and you need at least 1 hand for steering yourself if you're good at his mountain. help me find out the chinese name for lambak and tell me, ok? (although i already know what it's called, for my batch climbed it in june '06 too!). well, i guess most of the j2s woulda forgotten what's the chinese name for this mountain... (hint: it's associated with a nocturnal animal...)
tioman... let me think arh... just be careful of the urchins and sea stars (cos starfish are not FISH...), cos the urchins would hurt ya foot, and most prolly you'll be send to a local hospital within 12 hrs, or you foot will get unsightly =p (it's also a health danger, cos some sea urchins tend to release toxins into you when the spikes puncture your skin...). well, just enjoy the scenery, clean clear water, that you WONT get in singapore unless you're at a swimming pool, as well as the jetty jump and the royal rumble. it'll be too much fun, but can the medic dept pls be careful and dont lose yourself, cos if someone gets injured there, esp for punctures and "minor" grazes, most prolly they'll b screaming in pain, esp for lizzie and debbie, cos they're really scared of pain =p

-----
i guess it's the first time in this odac, that ended so early, at like 1715. lols... i thought there was so much more to do and would end at lke 1900... it's so out of the world kinda thing, cos odac is the LATEST cca to leave school, and usually by the time we leave school, it's like night study time le.. so it's pretty early... aint it? hehehe...
but well.... rmb to bring the bagpacks tmr!!! ooops... i think no one woulda come online at this point in time for the odac pple bah... would they? hehehe... but well, it's ophir, datok and lambak for them... so i suppose they'll b pretty excited.... some of the j1s voluntered to paint the banners... it ain't any business of the j2s anymore!!!

ian came over todae to see us, to talk, as well as hwaaa (aka michelle), who came over for rockafellas. i din go cos i din wanna blast my ears deaf with all the screaming and loud basses coming from the amplifiers, tho i really wanna hear gareth's great bass, and to see the j1 who's bass could be done even if the bass guitar was behind his head, and our indian man was SHOCKED. yes... he told the odac pple as he went for the time trial at toa payoh... that he was shocked when he saw the j1 plaing the bass behind his head, and that it was still in sync with the music. wonderful... aint it? =)

oh well... i feel that we're just drifting too far apart.. for me that is. tell me how you feel, tell me... cos you dont seem as happy as you were in jan. issit cos of school work? or issit cos of other stuff/issues?
all i can say now is...
i... miss... you...
...
...

bukit timah_gombak_batok race -20070303

2007-03-03T17:59:00.000+08:00

ima so bored ima just die man...

well...
went over to bt timah/gombak/batok for some race, that wasn't actually planned as well as i expected, cos there's always the few loopholes that could onlly be found by playing it =p
nvm. it's kinda hot tadae, cos it's a miracle it didn't even rain a lil bit at timah/gombak/bedok...

was kinda refreshing, cos i used to spend time there when i was much younger...
hahaha...
but well, most of the groups had a good headstart, cept for one, that stayed at the mrt station for 20mins after the last of the other groups had left. i gave them more than nuff clues to navigate them around, but guess they still ain't sure, cos the only moved when hwaaa told them to go to a certain place =p

oh well.... my group was walking the whole time, so it was kinda easy on the legs, despite the long walks we had, esp the few steps we had at bt timah, since we used to train there with 15kg backpacks, and it was sorta like a link to last year, where we had our 15kg training there, going through all those loops and trails... it was like reminising what happened in the past, only without the extra 15kg... =p

aft tt, we had prata at the prata shop in the middle of the line of shops again! well, it's like a common practice since the first time, aint it? =)

-----
jesse mccartney - because you live
Staring out at the rain with a heavy heart
It's the end of the world in my mind
Then your voice pulls me back
Like a wake-up call

I've been looking for the answer
Somewhere
I couldn't see that it was right there
But now I know, what I didn't know

[Chorus]
Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself
When nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world has twice as many stars in the sky

It's all right, I survived, I'm alive again
Cause of you, made it through every storm
What is life, what's the use
If you're killing time

I'm so glad I found an angel
Someone who was there when all my hopes fell
I wanna fly, looking in your eyes

[Chorus]
Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself
When nobody else can help
Because you live, girl (you live)
My world (my world) has twice as many stars in the sky

Because you live, I live

Because you live, there's a reason why
I carry on when I lose the fight
I want to give what you've given me
Always

[Chorus]
Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself
When nobody else can help
Because you live, girl
My world (my world) has twice as many stars in the sky

Because you live and breathe
Because you make me believe in myself
When nobody else can help
Because you live, girl (because you live)
My world has everything I need to survive
Because you live, I live, I live

-----
well well well... seems like i cant deny it anymore.
it's a fact... it just hurts too much inside.
because you live... because you live...

start of cts -20070226

2007-02-26T20:59:00.000+08:00

hey peps! i'm back!
and today is the start of the cts. yes. it's the CTs!
todae there's gp and econs, then maths tmr, bio on wed, chem on fri. bless those that haven study maths and bio, for mr lim said that maths paper is gg to be hard, and bio is ALWAYS a killer.
well... at least mao told me that the only way to get a decent "a" is to do the total number of questions, and getting everything right...
lols... how is it going to help? cos most prolly we'll just chiong all the questions and then get some of them right, missing abcd, then just get an e grade. hahaha... lydat sure kena scold by monster lim. hahaha...

anyway, gp todae was not ok, and the AQ didn't require us to make a stand... it's DISCUSS... ima so dead =p
well... at least econs was smooth sailing, for all that came out was the fiscal policy and more fiscal policy and more fiscal policy. ok it's like the whole paper was just on this small subtopic. hahaha...
was sitting right at the very back, for once i din feel like sitting at the front... haha... i dun feel like walking then... kekeke...

oh well... maths would most prolly b a killer with 3hrs of cold hard air-con, then freezing our brains in the extension (if i din get it wrongly...), so we cant work out the solutions, right? kinda evil... but i like! hehehe...

then where's bio? dun come out with what dna transcriptase or reverse-transcriptase, cos it's crappy n it so freaking s]long... come out respiration pls!!! =p
so much for chem, so much to cover and most prolly we'll all score so much and freak out melvin, if he decides to suan me again... tt so evil... grrrr....

oh well...
let me drown... ok?

nvm 2007 -20070225

2007-02-25T20:59:00.000+08:00

hey! i'm back!!!
yeah... back from nvm2007, 60 storeys of republic plaza, with the tag of 0322! i kinda like the nvm tee for this year, since last year was just a white cotton tee with "see you at the top" in black at the chest area...
this year, it's a dri-fit tee! and dere's the full nvm name at the back!
yay!!!

-
woke up at 0600 jus to find out that i was so freaking late for the registration time, which was at 0630 @ republic plaza... got there at 0700 tho, and there was already this freaking long queue of pple at the registration counter, all of which were in the "men's open" category. dere's 400++ pple!!! how to get into the top 30?!?!?!

my tag was 0322, detail was 54, reporting time 0850 (the "women's open" registration time)...
shoke hands wif the pple in my detail at the start-line, for which the photographers took like a few more shots (maybe it's rare in such a competition where no one knows who's in their own detail, lest they be frens and register at the same time...)
detail start time? 0916, with 2 mins interval between each detail's starting time...
kinda crippling at the 30th+ floor, but every thought of the pple below (and so many more...) jus provoked the will within me to push on and on and on...
i think i wasted quite some time at the 4th waterpoint (total of like 5 in all of the 60 storey challenge), cos that official din quite realise that there aint no dustbins and din even offer to throw away my cup =( damned...
reached the top when my stopwatch clicked 11min flat. grrr.... overtook like 2 full details plus another man with the tag of 029x (cant rmb the last no =p), and still so slow! damnit!

when the results came out, then i realied that no 23 (last person on the printed list) was some unknown person with the timing of 10m47s. DAMN!!! 13 secs, and i think it's all cos of that official. damned...

saw the ct only at like 11xx, cos they're like not early, and the 4 j1s that turned up in the morning to cheer felt so cheated, cos our good old demon said that they could gather at 0700 at the mrt to cheer. lols..
guess the rest of the team only turned up then... kekeke...

mdm hwaaaa took part in the "women's open" plus "lovers' challenge", ms chok n her hubby took part in the "lovers' challenge"!!! hahas...
well, hwaaaa took 11m55s for the indiv part, and 11m38s for the "lovers' challenge". wow... encouragement sure does ALOT of things...

wished the ct gd luck before going home @ like 1700, cos finished studying the notes that i brought along with me in the morning. wanted to cheer them right before they set off to the steps, but oh well... mugging got the better of me =p

-
oh well... life is so busy...
esp when there's a competition and common tests are just on the nxt day (yes, it's tmr, gp n econs...)

blehhh...
gonna burn myself out tonight, on games, TV and some econs notes =))
nitez pple!!!

another normal day -20070223

2007-02-23T21:12:00.000+08:00

oh well... just another normal day of lib training.

derrick and his antics. kinda sticky. dont let him know if any of you see this...
he's gonna try sth funny again... dotz...

well. kinda borewd and sleepy, and i cant study when derrick is there!!!
damnit. just making me laugh too much, and now the jacket has an adidas smell. grrr....

oh well.. nxt week is the start of cts, and guess what. most of my class pple aint prepared for it yet =p
n mr lim said that we hav to bear the (dunno what kind of) consequences if we fail any subjects. i hope i wont be the one failing... haha...

i guess it's just tough to face life, for it's:
"even though so tough for me"
but "who will stand by me"???
...
huh? tt means it's no one le...
...

this week end is gonna b so wasted. nvm '07 @ republic plaza on sunday, and sat is the only day that i have free, plus i still have to sleep early. so boring. event starting at 0630. and there's like 400+ pple doing men's open category... now i know why the rest of the cj odac guys dun wanna go for men's open... haha... so freaking early...

hai... wat more is there to do? just cant help it... guess my ct is destinied to fail, jus like my life... kekeke...

may the j2s get gd results...
gd luck and best wishes...

new year celebrations -20070217

2007-02-17T11:01:00.000+08:00

jus had cny celebrations in sch yesterday... not actually the kind that i wanted, but yeah... i was up dere =p
well, iz WANTED us to go up, n i thought it was like going to be only for my cca's j1s. din expect it to be like FOR THE WHOLE SCHOOL. wth!

though being backstage for such events aint uncommon for me, i still like to be sitting in front of the stage, looking at the performance. =p
it's jus a much better feeling bah...

flicking coins in tthe backstage, saboteuring one another backstage with algae's dustbin, napping, we were sure v light hearted =p too bad wc din go up n do the performance...
it's ok, i understand.. jus that iz aint v happy abt tt...

boring day indeed, and now ima smelling the chao-ta incense paper being blown up from the void deck... so much for the chao-ta smell.. cant they put like jasmine smell or watever that has a better smelling scent? grrrr....

anyway, i think my relatives are gg to come over todae, since today is like the day before new year on the lunar calender. bleh... so many things to take care of, troublesome little cousin, snatching of food/computer, fights, gambling (did i just say gambling? ooops.... it aint supposed to be here =p)...

oh well... life aint interesting anymore. it's been the same all these years, and adaptations just aint good enough. it's empty inside, and everything is on the outside, they just dont seem to be able to go in. it's so empty inside that it hurts. will anyone stretch out their hand?
it's a crime to say so... aint it? ...

-----
maroon 5 - she will be loved
Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

Tap on my window, knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore

It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls

Tap on my window, knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful

I don't mind spending every day
Out on your corner in the pouring rain, oh
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved
And she will be loved

Please don't try so hard to say goodbye
Please don't try so hard to say goodbye

I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain

Please don't try so hard to say goodbye

-----
may it not make you feel bad. but i just cant help it.
i'm sorry...
...

valentine's day? -14022007

2007-02-14T23:59:00.000+08:00

it's starting to get boring...
w/o u. w/o the smiles. it's dragging my life into the shadows...
but hey... i always wonder when i can hear your voice, see you smile, hear you laugh, see you giggle... everything.
just everything... it's just so beautiful to me and i cant deny it... can i?
i try to care, i try to give in every little bit. but well... is it going to waste?
i've got no idea...

whatever... i guess u might alrdy know what i mean... it's just too much =)
alrite. hit 10:34 for 2.4km cos of leg pain. for some unknown reasons... now both leg pain...
damn prof x for this sudden boost at the last stretch... if not, then i woulda broken him =p
nevertheless, hit below 10mins for a set of 40lvls like ytd? ...
just gotta love this... ima gg in men's open. let's just hope i win sth on the 25th alrite? i hope it all goes well n wishing my leg wont hurt so much so i can continue with training on the stairs. it's madness, and i believe our odac is one of the best in all the jcs =)
well, aint they always say the odac pple are MAD pple? i'll tell you... they're Motivated And Disciplined!
but hey.... this is ODAC, not some other cca ok... rmb some j1s that came for the pae saying that odac is the HARDCORE running cca. hey... it's almost true bah... dere's always the atheletes, canoeists, etc (maybe dragon boating is one of them? but we dont offer them this =p)
anyway... it's kinda hardcore where u can run till you get injured but still hav to push. it's madness, but it's MAD ok!

oh well.... todae's valentine and i've got no dates...
well... i suppose odac doesn't have much of dates, cept maybe don, ronald, mark, steff, nic, etc (and the list just goes on... it doesn't stop here btw =p)
hey... tt's quite alot alrdy... i jus feel lonely bah...
all these things... it's just to fill the emptiness in my heart that i feel...
nocturnality has become part of me. i'll still be waiting... waiting... waiting... even if dere's just this small chance...
oh yeah... thx for everything pple... it made my day a tad better, n many thx to the red envelope =p (din expect that to be there... but everyone received it =p)

how come i still have this feeling? aint it supposed to go away? let me drown myself in my games n music so i dont think of you... it just makes... (my heart hurts...)
dere's just so many things to do, but what's behind that taggie is true =)

rach is always asking if i'm looking for a you when i go into the class =/
it takes so much courage to walk in... i sonder why you bring one when u can have mine =)
my world revolves around you...

-----
lifehouse - you and me
What day is it
And in what month
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time

Cause it's you and me and all of the people
With nothing to do, nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people and
I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off of you

All of the things that I want to say
Just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words, you got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

Cause it's you and me and all of the people
With nothing to do, nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all of the people and
I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off you

Something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right

Cause it's you and me and all of the people
With nothing to do, nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people and
I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off of

You and me and all of the people
With nothing to do, nothing to prove and
It's you and me and all of the people and
I don't know why I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it
And in what month
This clock never seemed so alive

x-country 2007 -20070207

2007-02-07T23:25:00.000+08:00

oh well... it's another post again
*i always wonder what to put in this para =p*

alrite... back to the topic...
today's x-country was quite a killer bah... 25:30. so sucky...
top j1 runner? eugene tan @ xx:xx
top j2 runner? jackie tan @ 18:45 ; poh chiat's 2, don's 3
-just some tough fights from the odac peps against the atheletic peps =p
bahhh... *hey! ima sheep =p*
got bored by the time i hit the main road, plus stitches. grrr... lagged there. kinda justified the 25 min thingy =p
oh another point is not nuff water.. din hydrate nuff n was breathing the wrong way throughout =p
anyway, made it out alive and i hope i'll survive tmr, nvm's time trial...

hai... found a few new thoughts todae...
1. life is boring as it is. doing something just makes it less boring...
2. give everything your best shot, and you most prolly wont regret it...
3. love everyone around you like it's the last thing on earth...
4. everyone feels lost some time in their life. it's when they wake up that counts...
5. life isn't somthing that we can control. we can only try to mould it...
6. morning runs are effective as they are, but dere's always a reason to turn it down (i dun wanna start a debate on this)...
7. i've lost my mind...

alrite the last one wasn't meant to be there =p

hey didn't mean to ignore you... the computer is jus being hogged by my sisters...
.......
if only life wasn't meant to be...

anyway, tmr is maths ca. or is it?
kekeke... i've got no idea...

-----
westlife - why do i love you
Suddenly she's leaving
Suddenly the promise of love has gone
Suddenly breathing seems so hard to do

Carefully you planned it
I got to know just a minute too late oh girl
Now I understand it
All the times we, made love together
Baby you were thinking of him

Why do I love you?
Don't even want to
Why do I love you like I do?
Like I always do
You should have told me
Why did you have to be untrue... ?
(Love you like I do)
Why do I love you like I do?

Ain't gonna show no weakness
I'm gonna smile and tell the whole world I'm fine
I'm gonna keep my senses
But deep down where no one can hear me
Baby I'll be crying for you

Why do I love you?
Don't even want to
Why do I love you like I do?
Like I always do
You should have told me
Why did you have to be untrue... ?
(Love you like I do)
Why do I love you like I do?

Can't go back
Can't erase
Baby your smiling face
Oh no, I can't think of nothing else
but you (else but you) suddenly

Why do I love you?
Don't even want to
Why do I love you like I do?
Like I always do
You should have told me
Why did you have to be untrue... ?
(Love you like I do)
Why do I love you like I do?

Why do I love you?
Don't even want to
Why do I love you like I do?
Like I always do
You should have told me
Why did you have to be untrue.... ?
(Love you like I do)
Why do I love you like I do?

"cold war" -20070206

2007-02-06T23:59:00.000+08:00

yay!!!
finally pulled out some time from those addictive games to blog again!
cheers pple! =D

alrite... i think it's about time we end that "cold war" now alrite? i cant really stand it anymore... i think it's ok for you bah... got so many peps to talk to... i think it jus issn't rite for me to like cut rite in n say that to you, but well, wat's done cannot be undone...
i din really expect it to turn out this way =p
* i wonder how derrick got his info frm =s *
* i like to think =] *
anyway, it's kinda boring today, but i got a few more papercrafts out =p

olive wanna learn the rose, but it's so hard, i recommend her not to learn it... kekeke... oh well... it's kinda hard to make that rose from such a small piece of paper, cos all the peps that well it outside use a paper that has an area 4x of wat i'm using =p
* but mine's cute rite? hehehe... *

nevermind... tmr is the macritchie run... n my shin still not realli ok yet... i think ima just tape my shin n run the whole thing la. i hope it wont get boring like 15 rnds on track in sch cos dere's always sth different everytime i run @ macritchie. the peps r different... the trees are ever growing n stuff like that...
alrite... i hope tt i can complete the run tmr =p n most prolly tonite ima gg stay up late again =D

oh yeah... one thing to note todae...
we had badminton during pe, and me liu wanted to giv us all 7-0, wif all of us at zero, but obviously xy n gc had taken 4 pts from him, ending the match in 7-4...
accomplishment worx!!!
well... seems like i mus buck up in badminton too =DD
hmm.... where's my racket???

before i end this note, let's have another song =D

-----
kimberly locke feat clay aiken - without you
Clay:
Never even thought to cry
When I heard you say goodbye
Never said where you were going
There's no laughter in the air
Only silence everywhere
And so much left unspoken
Since you've been gone
I haven't been the same
I wish that i could see
Who's to blame

Without you, where do I belong?
Without you, how can I go on?
And no love but yours will ever do
Tell me how am i supposed to live my life?
Without you

Kimberley:
Was I lost in you and me
To the point i couldn't see
That what we had was dying
Now it's all that I can do

Both:
To see photographs of you

Kimberley:
And stop myself from crying
I should learn to live without your love

Both:
Got so many memories
But it's not enough

Without you, where do i belong?
Without you, how can i go on?
And no love but yours will ever do
Tell me how am I supposed to live my life
Without you?

Clay:
I feel helpless and, oh, so all alone

Kimberley:
Like I've never felt before

Both:
You made me feel alive
But I don't remember what it's like anymore

Without you, where do I belong?
Without you, how can I go on?
And no love but yours will ever do
Tell me how am I supposed to live my life
Without you?

Without you, where do I belong?
Without you, how can I go on?
Tell me how am I supposed to live my life
Without you?

Oh baby where do I belong?
Please tell how can I go on?
Without you...

"lost" bag issue resolved -20070202

2007-02-02T23:59:00.000+08:00

heyz...
finally resolved the j1's bag issue... damn goon... onli the stuff spilled out... scold me like ima not even worth a cent. i said sorry cos i had to, even if it was an accidental, unintentional spillage of ur stuff out. (evadne)
if u think that i've intentionally invaded your privacy, i'll say that no j2 (inc. me) would ever do that. the j2s respect the j1s. all of the j2s know that we just have to do that, and try to accomodate to how much you can do, although we're suppposed to push u guys to the limits.
oh well... wat else can we do to help you?

willingly lent her my jacket. scared she felt cold. hey don't you know that? =p
nvm. i guess it was pretty cold todae, donning the jacket all day =/

oh hey... c'mon...
seems like the j1s still dont get the idea that "odac = overcoming dat abstinatable character"? oh... and it has many other meanings... this is just one of the many that i've thought of =p
like what... "obstructing direct alternating current", "outstanding (with) determination and character", etc... (and the list just keeps on going, on and on... on and on...)

looks like today was quite wasted for me... shin splint kicked in on rnd 8 of pe. damnit. still havta go for 7 rnds, but most of it was walk/jog all the way =p
nevertheless, it's still hurting now, as ima typeing in this post...

alrite, now for some "lamers"...
rk house - no pork (hey... no offence... i just think that it's discriminative, but the reaction is just hilarious...)
kopitiam - ice kosong (well, another one by the same group of peps i suppose... it said so in the initial part =p)
*oh.... dere's no links cos the vids were removed, so no pt linking =p

this song just rings in my head...

-----
nelly furtado - maneater
[Timbaland:]
Take it back, take it back...

[verse 1]
Everybody look at me, me
I walk in the door you start screaming
C'mon everybody what you're here for
Move your body around like a nympho

Everybody get your neck to crack around
All you crazy people c'mon jump around
I wanna see you all on your knees, knees
You either wanna be with me or be me

[chorus]
Maneater
Make you work hard, make you spend all
make you want all of her love
She's a maneater
Make you rob cars, make you cut cards
Make you fall real hard in love
She's a maneater
Make you work hard, make you spend all
make you want all of her love
She's a maneater
Make you rob cars, make you cut cards
Wish you never ever met her at all.

[verse 2]
And when she walks she walks with passion
When she talks, she talks like she can handle it
When she asks for something boy, she means it
Even if you never, ever see it
Everybody get your neck to crack around
All you crazy people c'mon jump around
You doing anything to keep her by your side
Because she says she love you, love you long long time

[c'mon, man!]

[chorus]
Maneater
Make you work hard, make you spend all
make you want all of her love
She's a maneater
Make you rob cars, make you cut cards
Make you fall real hard in love
She's a maneater
Make you work hard, make you spend all
make you want all of her love
She's a maneater
Make you rob cars, make you cut cards
Wish you never ever met her at all.

[chants x 8]

[chorus]
Maneater
Make you work hard, make you spend all
make you want all of her love
She's a maneater
Make you buy cars, make you cut cards
Make you fall real hard in love
She's a maneater
Make you work hard, make you spend all
make you want all of her love
She's a maneater
Make you buy cars, make you cut cards
Wish you never ever met her at all

[ending]
Never ever met her at all

You wish you never ever met her at all
[x 7]

Been around the world I ain't ever seen a girl like this.
(She's a maneater, maneater)
[x 4]

-----
oh well... wat can i do? i just havta wait... and wait... and wait...
then eason's ten years play on...
...

j1's "lost bag" -20070131

2007-01-31T23:59:00.000+08:00

hey peps! i'm back =p
and the taggie is up.
kudos to cbox.com, cos it's one of the best taggies around =)

alrite. todae's lecture was much better than the past few that we had =p
bio: more clips
gp: slower pace (well... maybe an avg lecturer, but certainly more interesting =D)
*although idk who's the gp lecturer we had todae...

well, did 3 sets of 40 floors at 146 toa payoh, @ 4:42, 5:52, 7:06.
i certainly didn't chiong it fully, cos wasted to push the j1s along. they dont seem to be pushing. they dont really pant when they get up there. they're such a bunch of peps that need so much more help.
(i'll kick all of you if i can =p; but i'm not that bad =D)
hwa @ 4:32
gareth @ 4:06 (shld be this, cant really rmb =p)
lala @ --- (c.t. went to macritchie =p)

oh well.. it's a killer, cos onli me n christine did all 3 sets, while the rest of the j2s didn't actually do 5 tho foxy said we SHOULD do 3 sets. jus to show them that we can actually do it, and still be faster than them...

oh well... made a j1's stuff fall out of her red crumpler, cos i took it out of the store by the flap (oh well, who ask you dun wanna fasten it up thru the "locks", and just use the velcro =p).
anyway, she cried. cos she tot that her bag got lost and even iz oso say dun believe is "insider job"... in the end she found all of her things, beside (outside) her bag, cos i din noe which items was her's and which ones aint... kekeke...
hai... din realli expect anyone to cry over that kinda thing.. maybe just curse n voodoo the person who did it (aint it me? damn... i'm cruel =p).

iz n april just wanna rectify that kinda problems in the future, but we had to find solutions ourself =x oh great! then we can ask them to LOCK UP their bads themselves, then we need not worry anymore about it =p

well... u sure can use my jacket, cos i dun really need it anyway... i jus bring it to sch for the sake of bringing it, cos i rarely use it, less i feel like sliping in the lecture hall =p

anyway, here's another song for the day =p

-----
richard marx - right here waiting
Oceans apart, day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain
If I see you next to never
How can we say forever

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here, waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here, waiting for you

I took for granted, all the times
That I thought would last, some how
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now
Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' crazy

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here, waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here, waiting for you

I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end, if I'm with you
I'll take the chance

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' crazy

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here, waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here, waiting for you
Waiting for you

-----
hey wait... it's supposed to be emo =p

first post -20070126

2007-01-26T23:59:00.000+08:00

ok this is the first post of this blog, and here goes a song to accompany it, cos i'm actually a lil bored rite now =)

anyway...
i wonder why i don't see my class having that kinda fun anymore... it just seems strange, cos my t29 was once the noisiest class in the sch, now even yee has a bridge photo =p

eh nr...
if u c this...
i wonder if you'll say that im avoiding you, but no... i dont wanna interupt ur life, cos most prolly i'll jus mess it all up. i jus have this feeling =s

-----
bbmak - back here
Baby set me free From this misery
I cant take it no more
Since you ran away, Nothings been the same
dont know what i'm livin for

Here i am, so alone
and there's nothing in this world i can do

Untill you're back here baby
Miss you, want you, need you so
Untill you're back here baby yeh
There's a feelin inside, I want you to know
You are the one and i can't.... let you go

So i told you lies, Even made you cry
Baby i was so wrong.
Girl i promise you, Now my love is true
This is where my heart belongs

'Cause here i am, so alone
and there's nothing in this world i can do

Untill you're back here baby
Miss you, want you, need you so
Untill you're back here baby yeh
There's a feelin inside, I want you to know
You are the one and i can't.... let you go

And i wonder...
Are you thinkin of me?
'Cause i'm thinkin of you.

And i wonder...
Are you ever comin back in my life?

'Cause here i am, so alone
and there's nothing in this world i can do...

Untill you're back here baby
Miss you, want you, need you so
Untill you're back here baby yeh
There's a feelin inside, I want you to know
You are the one and i cant...

Untill you're back here baby....
Untill you're back here baby ....
Untill you're back here baby ....

There's a feelin inside, I want you to know
You are the one and i cant...

Untill you're back here baby....
Untill you're back here baby ....
Untill you're back here baby ....
Untill you're back here baby.... yeh
Untill you're back here baby ....
Untill you're back here baby ....

-----
well... how was that? nice? i cant find a weblink for the playing of this song so...
sry =p

ok... ima go get a nice tagboard now... cya peps =D